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Oh, if only I Post Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 5:32:18 +0000 Farewell you, my unknown beloved ones, with whom I have lived through so many pages, before whom I have bared my diseased soul, my whole self to the last broken little screw, to the last cracked spring . I am going . Oh, if only I had actually broken myself to piecesl If only I had actually found myself with her in some place beyond the Wall, among beasts showing their yellow tusks. Autor of the post: Undefined Through the decks of glass Post Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 5:12:52 +0000 If only I had never actually returned herel It would be a thousand, a million times easier! But now what? Now to go and choke that 1 But would it help? No, no, nol Take yourself in hand, 0-503! Set into yourself the firm hub of logic; at least for a short while weigh heavily with all your might on the lever and, like the ancient slave, turn the millstones of syllogisms until you have written down and under stood everything that happened.When I boarded the Integral, everyone was already there and in his place; all the cells of the gigantic hive were filled. Through the decks of glass tiny, antlike people below, at the telegraph, dynamo, transformers, altimeters, ventilators, indicators, motor, pumps, tubes. Autor of the post: Undefined "Well?" I asked Post Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 5:00:23 +0000 In the saloon people were sitting over tables and instruments, probably those commissioned by the Scien tific Bureau; near them the Second Builder and his two aides. All three had their heads down between their shoulders like turtles, their faces gray, autumnal, rayless. "Well?" I asked. Autor of the post: Undefined And, generally speaking, nobody knows Post Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 4:43:37 +0000 "Well, somewhat uncanny one of them replied, smiling a gray, rayless smile. "Perhaps we shall have to land in some un known place. And, generally speaking, nobody knows . Autor of the post: Undefined It tells about three Numbers Post Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 4:27:12 +0000 " I could hardly bear to look at them, when in an hour or so I was to throw them out with my own hands, to cast them out from the cozy figures of our Table of Hours, to tear them away forever from the mother s breast of the United State. They re minded me of the tragic figures of "The Three Forgiven Ones" a story known to all of our school children. It tells about three Numbers, who by way of experiment were exempted for a whole month from any work. Autor of the post: Undefined They would stop Post Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 4:14:02 +0000 1 "Go wherever you will, do what you will," they were told. The unhappy three spent their whole time wand ering around their usual place of work and gazing within with hungry eyes. They would stop on the plazas and busy themselves for hours repeating the motions which they had been used to making during certain hours of the day; it became a bodily neces sity for them to do so. Autor of the post: Undefined I repeat, it was hard Post Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 3:58:03 +0000 They would saw and plane the air; with unseen sledge hammers they would bang upon unseen stakes. Finally, on the tenth day, they could bear it no longer; they took one another by the hand, entered the river, and to the accompani ment of the March they waded deeper and deeper until the water ended their sufferings forever. I repeat, it was hard for me to look at them, and I was anxious to leave them. Autor of the post: Undefined In the narrow passage gray Post Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 3:45:59 +0000 "I just want to take a glance into the engine room, and then off!" I said. They were asking me questions: "What voltage should be used for the initial spark, how much ballast water was needed in the tank aft?" As if a phonograph were somewhere within me, I was giving quick and precise answers, but I, my inner self, was busy with my own thoughts. In the narrow passage gray unifs were passing, gray faces, and, for a second, one face with its hair low over the forehead, eyes gazing from deep beneath it it was that same man. Autor of the post: Undefined This quivering did not stop Post Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 3:29:12 +0000 I under stood: they had come, and there was no escape from it for me; only minutes remained, a few dozen minutes.An infinitesimal, molecular quiver of my whole body. This quivering did not stop to the very end it was as if an enormous motor had been placed under the very foundation of my body, which was so light that the walls, partitions, cables, beams, lights everything was quiv ering. Autor of the post: Undefined They were calling me: quick! Post Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 3:12:08 +0000 I did not yet know whether she was there. But I had no time . They were calling me: quick! To the commander s bridge; time to go where? Gray, rayless faces. 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